Saturday, September 29, 2007

Today I'm going to write an advice column.

You--get over yourself and realize the world does not revolve around what you want to do and what you think. Finally, after all the years scientists have been looking for the center of the universe, and all they had to do was find you. Who knew.

You--stop saying you're going to do something and then not do it. It's happened three times in the last week. Enough already. And we're so over your hair, too.

You--Stop getting all up in my personal space when you talk to me. You're a close talker and it's annoying. I keep moving back when you do it and you follow me. Stop it.

You--where are you anyway? Have you dropped off the planet?

Fondly,

Me

6 comments:

danelle said...

Oh that's funny. Actually it's mostly funny 'cause I'm not one of the "yous".

Laurie said...

Ouch. And it IS three different "yous" there, right? I've read it several times and I don't THINK I see myself...
xoxox

cb said...

LW-- are you sure you don't see yourself? :-) Just kidding.

Laurie said...

Well, #1 is a little close to home. And #4 is a place where I periodically end up. I guess I just don't see myself THIS WEEK.
xoxox

Anonymous said...

Do this more often!

rr said...

Well, I usually do think the world revolves around me so that one could be me.

OELS is taking over my life and I feel like I am living in someone else's body and I am not doing things I say lately so this could be me too. And I have been complaining about my hair a lot. hmmmm...

I am not a close talker so this is definitely not me.

I see you everyday so this isn't me either.

And the simple fact that I assume that I would even be mentioned in this post refers us back to the first one. Please tell me I am the center of the universe. It will make me feel better. =)